From headaches and stomachaches to depression and anxiety, being bullied sometimes leads to serious health issues. Bullying hurts, in the moment and long after it has stopped. Yet parents, teachers and school officials have a difficult time detecting bullying, and kids are hesitant to speak up because they fear it will make the situation worse.

Here’s how parents can help.

Understanding Bullying

Bullying can be physical or verbal. It can involve damage to a kid’s property or take place through technology, such as social media or on smart devices. Bullying can also be relational or social: Spreading malicious rumors or excluding a child from the group are two examples.

A simple conflict that is quickly resolved is not bullying. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, youth bullying involves repeated, unwanted aggressive behavior by another youth or youths – but not siblings or dating partners. In bullying, there is also an observed or perceived power imbalance.

Seeing the Signs

Changes in your child’s normal behavior may be warning signs of bullying. Talk with your child if you see any of these behaviors:

• Anxiety.
• Feelings of helplessness or decreased self-esteem.
• Inability to sleep well or frequent nightmares.
• Changes in eating habits.
• Frequent headaches or stomachaches, feeling sick or faking sickness.
• Declining grades, loss of interest in schoolwork or not wanting to go to school.
• Lost or damaged clothing, books or electronics.
• Wanting to stay away from normal routines, such as taking the school bus.
• Sudden loss of friends or staying away from social situations.
• Self-destructive behaviors.

Helping Your Child

When your child is being bullied, reassure them that they are not to blame, and they should not feel ashamed. Get all the information you can about the situation, then let the authorities know.

Don’t confront the bully’s parents – leave that to the school or the police. Immediately get police help, medical attention or both if there is:

• A weapon involved.
• Threat of physical injury.
• Threat of hate-motivated violence.
• Bodily harm or sexual abuse.
• Any accusation of an illegal act.

Develop a safety plan. Talk about locations, groups of kids and activities to stay away from. Make sure your child uses the buddy system when at risk. Discuss where to go and whom to ask for help in case of an incident.

Talk to your child’s teacher, leaders in your faith community or friends and acquaintances about safe activities that meet your child’s interests and can help them form additional friendships, such as the arts, clubs or athletics.

Staying Aware

According to StopBullying.gov, only about 20% of school bullying incidents are reported. Kids have many reasons for not admitting they’re being bullied, so it’s a good idea to bring up the subject each school year – even if you don’t think anything is wrong.

Keep up with your child’s annual wellness visits, too. Your child’s healthcare provider asks questions that can help uncover issues you may not be aware of.

If you’re looking for a primary care provider for your child, Aultman Medical Group has many providers who are accepting new patients. Visit aultman.org/newdoc to find one near you.

If your child is showing signs of mental or emotional distress, Aultman Medical Group Behavioral Health and Counseling Center is ready to help.

Sources:
Centers for Disease Control and Prevention
The StayWell Company, LLC
StopBullying.gov
Wake Forest University